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BeachCutie888
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Name: Supreme Dictator
Interests: Everything and yet nothing.
Expertise: Being Supreme Dictator for Life.
Industry: Legal
Message: message me
Member Since:
7/5/2003
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| Aloha kidlets.
I've been primarily using blogger as of late. I don't know if I'm going back to Xanga. Not too many updates from people anymore. Not that I can really say anything but thats ok.
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| Currently Playing - Naked As We Came by Iron & Wine
Current Taste - Apple Juice Box
Current Thought - I laugh to keep from crying
Current Procrastination - Sleeping, it's for the losers.
I walked home from work today. I left work at 10:15 and got home about 11:20. It was good times. I listened to music and danced my way home. Along the way I saw 7 cops. It was pretty ridiculous even for the end of the month and nearing Halloween. I thought about a lot while walking home. For one, I really like taking walks around this time of year. I took one a couple days ago in the middle of downtown Naperville for about two hours. In that time I found both bus stops, new ideas for certain things and called the cops on a domestic dispute. This guy was screaming and yelling at this woman in a car. I waited there for about a half hour while this guy stood in the middle of the street screaming and ranting. The cops didn't come until they were called via phone. Odd.
October is a bad month for me. It always has been. I think only back when I was a small child was it good. It was my last Halloween trick or treating and I went as a shepherd. I had my route planned out and went to all the houses the other kids didn't go to. I ended up with 9.6 pounds of candy. I consumed all of it within a week. And oddly enough I was the skinniest child ever. Besides that October has just been bad. I was grounded for two weeks once way back when. I think that's when my trend for this month started. For some reason I'm always extremely sad and I get these terrible nightmares. Pretty trippy.
I seem to act weird in October. Not my normal self. This October was worse though. Too many outside stressors added on top of such a crappy month. But the thing is I'm so fed up with so much crap and irony that I've come to the point of not caring. After Friday where I ended up curled on the shower floor crying, I came to a realization that I've had for awhile. I'll leave that for another time. Too much would go into trying to explain. For my next point, read below.
I want someone to care for; to kiss, to cuddle, to give me crazy hugs at the most random times, to show up unexpectedly just to say hi, someone who will want to be with me, who will miss me, text me just to say that, someone to watch movies with or play video games, to go on adventures, to dance in the rain, go to parks and swing at odd hours of the night, to be able to make stuff for like food or knitted accessories, someone who actually wants me.
I'm tired of this game. Please make it end.
Am I so dear
Do I run rare
You've changed some
Peach, plum, pear
P.S. Sorry this was such a somber post. Next time things will be written in a more upbeat tone. Just wanted to get some things out in the open, for once. Ha. Funny that it happens now.
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| Hey all. Sorry that I've abandoned this whole xanga effort. Life certainly is different. I forgot how much I enjoyed writing in this thing. So. Whats new. Hm. Well. Pretty much everything. Nipper passed away on Sunday. I held her while she died. I could feel her heartbeat stop underneath my hand. I feel hollow. She was Nipper. I can't describe it. It's something that can't be put into words. I called the receptionist at the second vet a f***ing b***h. Ha. Not like me huh? Surprise.
I like rock climbing. Also surprise huh? Yeah. I'm afraid of the whole falling from heights. I remember the last time that I climbed was back in middle school and I was scared as all. This time I went with a couple of my friends to her work and we climbed there. It took me a little stop being afraid. Then I got into it. I think it's because when you are climbing the only thing you are thinking about is where your next step is going to be. And that step only affects you. Not anyone else in your life. Like most decisions and planned steps happen to do.
Another new thing. I like xbox. I know. So many shocks. A friend of mine got me into playing Gears of War where you get to chainsaw aliens in the face, or your teammate if you are playing against each other and not in co-op. My new thing is Halo 3. Yeah Yeah. I hear the thuds on the floor. Laugh it up chicas. I know Kari playing Halo. Has the world gone awry?
Which sadly today has been one of the crappiest days I've had in a long time. Everything and anything that could have happened, happened today. Seriously, it's lets shit on Kari's emotions day. Every person who I would never see showed up while I was working a shift that I never work but for some reason today I was. So now I'm sitting on the couch, listening to a compilation cd titled Rabbits, Penguins and Pandas Oh my.
Two things left to say for today. One is a poem. Written by yours truly. A work in progress.
The pearl on the shower floor
Watching fields of innocence burn
Falling fast goes the charred windup toy.
Another is a section of lyrics that closely states one part of my feelings right now.
You were trying to kill me
With a hundred knives
That was not the question
I thought you had inside
I know you're there
I wish you'd talk
Should I stay on,
Or should I get off?
P.S. I'm getting my lip pierced. Hurrah.
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Hey peoples, long time no write. Oh well. I've been uber busy. With all the school and work and Faisal-ing and such. I shouldn't be up this late considering I have to get up in a little while but that's dandy.
Auto show in FEB! Woohooo!!!!
Man. I'm redoing my room. Whoopee! It's going to be sweet. Although it will take a while considering the whole money issues. Which brings me to another point, money should grow on trees. But only certain trees. Certain magical trees that should reside right outside my window that only I can see so other people can't steal my tree money. Or burn it. Anywho, I've got the color scheme set up. Finally. It only took a couple of years. Ha. Funny.
I really want to get a laptop. Free wi-fi = skip skip hooray! Or a computer in general. That'd be cool also. I miss talking to people online. Such as Trefen and Turbzy. *tear*
Now the sound of music
Comes in silver pills
Engineered to suit you
Building cheaper thrills
The music of rebellion
Makes you wanna rage
But it's made by millionaires
Who are nearly twice your age
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